Chinese River Dolphin Declared Extinct (International)

I, Ben Tan, am honoured to be the first to have his report published on The Alternative. I have been asked to do a report on the extinction of Chinese River Dolphin (Lipotes vexillifer).

As of 13 December 2006, this mammal has been declared "functionally extinct". For the 99% of you who don't understand what that means, it means that there is too little of that spieces to play a significant role in the ecosystem.

Due to pollution, overfishing and loss of habitat of the Yangtze River, the numbers of the animal dropped from 6,000 in the 1950s to 7 in 1998.

I know what you all are thing; who gives a hoot! Even though this is the first mammal to be declared extinct in decades, nobody cares. In fact, this wasn't even published in The Straits Times as a major article. I mean, it is EXTINCTION! Nothing could be worse to a commmunity than that. Kudos to the apathetic!

Ben Tan.

THE ALTERNATIVE

This is something new that my friends and I are trying out.... As of today I will be changing this from a caption site to a "newspaper" site with my friends.... Without further ado, I shall introduce the staff of the alternative.....

Head editor: Defensedefumer (me)
Probably the most "sane" person working for The Alternative, Defensedefumer reads and publishes all the articles. He usually allows his writers great freedom but still has certain restrictions for the pieces. Oh, in case you were wondering, the staff uses psuedonyms for thier work. So it will be difficult to pin us down, haha.

Ben Tan (Local and international news)
Opinionated, outspoken, tactless and energetic, Ben Tan gets on everyone's nerves (including his peers) very easily. Maybe it is so due to two years of underachievement at SRJC (Serangoon Junior College).

Natasha Romanov (International news)
Our only Russian correspondant, Natasha tends to have a pessimistic view on life. She equates this to "Russian Irony". It is interesting to note that she only started learning English 6 years ago.

Nurlisa (Art and local news)
Seven years ago, Nurlisa thought art was a watse of time. Her opinion hasn't changed much since. Our only Malay contributor hopes to be a famous "unknown" author some day.

November Foxtrot (Technological news)
Our American friend knows next to nothing about computers. He claims 128kb is bigger than 64gb. Go figure.

Torch'd (Entertainment news)
A former actor himself, Torch'd believes he has more talent than Paris Hilton. He has yet to prove it.

CDI (Sports news)
Not even a former sportsman himself, CDI thinks he knows everything by watching TV.

Dr. Storm (Health news)
Not a real doctor herself, Dr. Storm brings reliable information concerning health care. She reads up on medicine on her free time. A true blue nerd, she is very cynical about alternative medicine. The irony!

The 198 (Philosophy)
I'll be honest. I don't know much about The 198. I place him/her on the team as he/she contributes interesting insights.

That's not nice....

My JC class is bigger than this!!!

I am the Game... I want to play....

Get ready for the steamiest fight of the year.. literally!

It doesn't matter what you call me!!!